Discovering Donna


Making a Name for Yourself

Posted in Life by Donna on April 22, 2009
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Ok- I have to admit this is a phrase that made me stop and think about it seriously the other day.  I have a friend (who shall remain nameless for now) who sent an email to me and said she was very frustrated that she was getting knocked on her ass every time she turned around and she was trying to hard to make a name for herself.  She wants to be the next J.K. Rowling…  Now don’t get me wrong.  I’m all about supporting her in this.  But at the same time, I get the feeling that she feels she has to make a name for herself in order to be something important. 

     So I’m asking, why does it matter?  Shouldn’t it just matter that we have a solid reputation as a human?  Why do we feel the need to be “popular” in order to feel like something?  Now I can see part of her point.  There is nothing I’d like better than to write a best selling book and have a J. K. Rowling story book type ending.  But the reality is the idea hasn’t come to me and that’s on hold as a result of that.  But that’s fine.  It’s something I want to do to be able to say I can do it.  At this point, who cares if it’s a best seller or not.  Who cares if it gets published at all?   She’s made me look and realize that the book author part of me is not something that defines me.  It’s just something I want to do.

Actually I’ve come to realize that alot of what I used to think would define me isn’t the case at all.  Just because I want to do something, it doesn’t mean that I have to do it in order to feel worthy.  I guess it’s all about self acceptance.  But at the same time, I still wonder.  Does it matter that I’m not Angelina Jolie or J.K. Rowling?  No  But most importantly……

Why does it matter?  I am me-I don’t want to be anyone else.  And at the same time I’m happy that I’m not going to be Miss Popular.  I’m happy that I don’t feel the need to make a name for myself. 

Does that make sense??

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7 Responses to 'Making a Name for Yourself'

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  1. Jennifer said,

    What’s really important to the world is making a name for yourself with your family (spouse, children, etc…). Because in the end, the only ones who will truly miss you is them.

    Would it be nice to be known to all the world, eh…sometimes I think yes, other times no. But it’s great to hear your thoughts on this. Thanks for sharing!

  2. Finn said,

    Better to make a life for yourself. If they recognize you while you’re doing it, great. If not, you’ve had a life, right?

  3. Cafe Chick said,

    Doing just what you’ve said is a rarity in itself. Society (and the media) puts pressure on us as individuals to be somebody, or at least be somebody who conforms to certain stereotypes. Eg, if you are going to be an author, it will be in the J K Rowling league, otherwise you’re not deemed successful. However, why shouldn’t (and can’t) we be happy being ourselves and striving to be the best person that we can be? I agree with Finn; if you’re recognised along the way, then that’s great, but it’s a bonus.

  4. Donna said,

    They are all such true points ladies, thank you! 🙂 Chick, I think our projects are such a help in this area–don ‘t you?
    Finn- I like that- better to make a life for yourself. Excellent point.
    Jenn-I like the idea of being important to my family.

    I’m slowly learning—–

  5. Lawless said,

    I think that if it’s something that one feels, deep inside, then they should follow their dreams to fruition. If it’s only to become famous, or rich, well… that’s another story. But, if it’s writing a book (or anything else) that you have inside you, to accomplish, then do it. I started writing a book, several years ago. Then, I transfered it to a disc, which I lost. Luckily, I found the rough draft, and even though it was never completely, I can go back and do that. Some day, when I feel ready, I will do just that. But, it isn’t for anyone but me. Sure, I will allow others to read it… but, I don’t need it published, to make money off of it, or become a known author. It’s just something that I enjoy doing. A part of me. And, I think that it is for you as well, my friend.

  6. Kristin said,

    I’m making my mark by helping a few people each week or each month. I don’t need to be famous to be valuable.

  7. Donna said,

    I think that was my point. That we all do things for ourselves. Making a name isn’t so important in the grand scheme of things. to me, it just makes me think that we do nothing but furstrate and (sometimes) hurt ourselves in the long run if we seek to do that.


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