Discovering Donna


This was more than I thought it would be

Posted in 101,109 in 2009,Life by Donna on March 30, 2009

It’s 6:31 and I’ve been awake since 4. I’ve been trying to think of a good blog post for a while now, but nothing really good had come to mind.  So, I’m not sure what I really want to say here.  It’s not that I couldn’t sleep.  I can’t say that.  I slept like a rock last night and I was out before 11.  And yes, that is a good thing.  I think.

I haven’t really felt like myself the past couple of weeks.  (I know, since when is that anything new?)  But, this is different.  Like something is missing.  I’ve been trying to figure what that could be.  But I think this am, as I’m watching it get lighter and lighter outside, I think I’m missing me.  I finished a few things on my lists in the past couple of weeks and I’ve felt better.  A lot better when I’ve been doing something like that.

Because those lists that I’ve made, they are things that I wanted to do.  Things that I wanted to accomplish.  Sure my 101 was changing all the time, but then again, I’ve decided that they are on that list for a reason.  If I want to do more, I should make another list.  Right?

Well, I’ll let you in on a secret.  Are you ready?  I did.  I made another list.  But it’s different.  It’s for me, it’s things that I want/need to do for me.  Because the two lists I have right now, they are to help me, but they aren’t all that I need.  I’ve discovered that over the past few days.

So, if you want to know what’s on the list, you can let me know.  I’ll be happy to share it with you.  🙂  Of course, I think a couple of people who read this already have seen it.  I actually set up another blog to get out some feelings and it’s weird because those posts sort of fit for here.  So I would say look for them in the next couple of days.  I think that blog is going to be just for that list and the projects on it.  So if you want that link, let me know.

I have a feeling that that blog is going to be a great experience for me.  I set it up origionally to get out my feelings about some things but as Cafe Chick pointed out here it’s a way to get to know me. If I can’t vocalize my feelings on my blog, what good is it? (this is my thought) so I’m doing that.

I’m taking a stand for me. So here is your warning. If you’re offended by anything that’s going to be posted. I’m sorry. Sort of. I mean let’s face it. I’m so much better at writing down how I’m feeling than expressing it. So that is my way of expression. And that’s what I’m doing.

For me. Because I want to. Because I need to. Because I can. Because after all, it’s Discovering Donna, Right????!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh and a new feature (I’m going to add when I think about it) What’s playing?
Homesick-Train
Iris-Goo Goo Dolls
Free-Train
These Hard Times-Matchbox 20
Holiday in Spain-Counting Crows

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You mean I actually finished something!?

Posted in 101,109 in 2009,Mom by Donna on March 27, 2009
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Well isn’t that a suprise?  I saw Twilight and marked it off my 109.  I’m not that impressed by it.  It was ok.  I finished my small quote book!  And I’ve gotten 5 pictures for my 26 things that I’m determined to finish.  And, I did something, I’m more proud of than anything.  I scrapped my bucket list.  And started a new one.  Why you ask?  Wel I decided that there are a few things in me that need to be adjusted, dealt with and tended too.  So, I’m going to do that.  I’m determined to finish that this weekend.

I’ve been seeing Troy Dunn EVERYWHERE!  TV, WEB, Magazines, he’s everywhere I tell ya.  I’m only hoping that one of these days I’ll get an email or call saying he wants to help.  Otherwise, I’ll have to start digging by going into records and stuff back home and there is no telling what that is going to entail.  I have such an urge to find my mother right now that it’s not funny.  I guess I just need the closure as to what happened.

How is life for you?

Better yet, get inspired……

Posted in 101,109 in 2009,changes,List,List of changes,My Life by Donna on February 18, 2009

I haven’t felt like posting or reading or doing much truth be told for about a week now.  I somehow got a miserable cold that kept me in bed most of the time and am starting to feel human again.  Well yesterday I started feeling better.  Today, much better.  I have managed to keep on trucking, looking for a job though.  I submitted my resume to several places and got a hit today from Craig’s list!  It’s for an electrical office and I’m not going to complain.  It’s right down the street and that’s a good sign.  The pay is pretty decent.  And I can pick up things like THAT so I don’t think it will be an issue.  Ya know!?  I have an interview today and I have a good feeling about it.  The owner has a 4 year old dog that is always in the office so how can that be bad?  I don’t think that it can.

It’s not in insurance, which, I don’t know if I’m going to complain or not.  Insurance jobs are hard to get around here.  I’ve wanted out of insurance to do other stuff and maybe this is that way.  Who knows!?

But anyways.  Hey while you are at it and you’re here, if you look at my 101 you’ll see some Major and I do mean major changes!  You’ll see that the second list is now gone and some from that list have made it to the 101 list.  You know why?  Another spurt of creativity.  I decided that this may be a short term bucket list, but I wanted a long term bucket list.  So I made one.  I don’t have it up anywhere, I’ve only taken a few things from my 101 and my 109 and put them on it.  This is a whole other thing.

Not sure where the inspiration came from, but I’m taking it and running.  Today is going to be a great day!

Now don’t forget to leave a comment and let me know you were here!  I love comments!

Wants and Changes

Posted in 101,changes,NaBlPoMO by Donna on February 4, 2009
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So, I missed posting yesterday, it’s not that bad I know.  I signed up for NaBloPoMo again this month but it’s okay that I missed a day.  The subject for this month is Want.  Today I took a look at the blog and tried to figure out what I wanted to do with it.  I wanted to change something but I just wasn’t sure what.  So after debating today I finally figured it out.  I added another page it’s called My Life Right Now and it’s what I’m doing right now.  I also took some stock in my 101 lists and tried to figure out if I really wanted to do all of them.  And I didn’t.  So yeah, once again, I changed a few things and I’m okay with it.  I put a few things on there that I want to do that I normally wouldn’t.  Now if I do them all or not that’s a different story.

So what about you?  What do you want?

And the Fun Continues

Posted in 101,109 in 2009,Birthday,Life,NaBlPoMO by Donna on January 18, 2009
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So today was a continuation of my birthday celebration and my plan to really celebrate this birthday.  And we did.  I spent most of the day just chillin’ and working on cross stitch.  Then at 4 we started the party which was all the close family.  I got my sheet cake, I’ll post pictures sometime.  We had fajita’s with veggies and beans and an awesome guacamole that Florrie made.  After dinner we did the cake and I blew out my three candles that were matches.  And I got more presents!  Chocolate from Florrie, a book from Katy and Jeremy and a scrapbook organizer from Judy!  Wow, I really got some wonderful gifts and they all contribute to my things to do.  The sangria was great, the margarita was wonderful.  We played games, chilled out and just had fun.

All in all it’s been a really great birthday and it’s been celebrated in an awesome way.   A great start to a great year coming up!

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!

Have I Really Accomplished Something?

Posted in 101,109 in 2009,NaBlPoMO,Things Completed by Donna on January 17, 2009
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So I’m trying to figure out if I’ve really accomplished something while I’ve been out with this ankle incident.  I was told Friday I can’t go back to work until the walking boot is off.  I’m a little upset but I’m trying to forge on.  I’ve had some ideas about this cake decorating thing I want to do.  What will happen has yet to be decided but it certainly makes you go hmmm???

So anyways.  Back to my real issue.  Have I really accomplished something?  Seriously.  Let me go back to my three lists and see, because it always helps to reason this out.  I started the 101 in July and it’s now middle of January.   So looking back at all three lists, what have I done?

Let’s take the newest my 109 in 2009.  I’ve now named a star, taught Hopper a trick, created my own signature, established a writing schedule, read The Pagan Stone, did something with my blogger journal, created my own website (even if it is under construction), started the Proverbs 31 study, learned to cross stitch and completed a project, made a list of 25 things about my body that I love (now that one was hard), set up a tag list for the blog, completed part of Logan’s project (I crossed it off because what I wanted to do initally is finished.)  And those are just the ones that are completed-not the works in progress.

Now on my 101 in 1001 project- I’ve gotten someone else to do a list (JoAnn), Gone on a road trip, submitted a photo to Jones Soda, Identified 100 things that make me happy, watched a sunset and took pictures, told the parents I Love You each time I talked to them so it’s now a habit, gone to a state I haven’t been to, discovered a new favorite food (hummus), didn’t eat fast food for 30 days, wrote a letter to my father, made someone laugh until they cried, acquired a new digital camera and printer station, given someone a suprise gift for no reason at all, Made my own 12 rules for happiness (which I need to learn to follow), visited Powell’s in Portland, OR, moved out of my comfort zone, shared my blog with everyone, Made a top 10 list of favorite songs, movies and books of all time, found the perfect purse, bought a lottery ticket, moved my blog to wordpress from blogger, found out what the Powell Story Poles in Anacortes are and took pictures, rode in a boat, and made a new list of 101 things-and that’s not all I have in progress or have listed up in my 109 that I took from this list.

As for the other list- I set up a photo blog and am keeping the photo album up to date, I found a type of fish that I will eat, Had a job I was happy with (until the ankle), kissed the hubby in the rain, Did a 100 things about me, got a new computer (well not NEW but it’s new to us), wrote a poem,  got my library card, entered a contest (several as a matter of fact) and have a few on this list in progress too.

Now what do I have in progress??  Well from All the lists I have-start and complete my 1 thing that makes me happy each day, tomorrow is the big celebration for my 33rd, I’m on book 47 of 101, I’m sticking to my writing schedule, I’m working on my a to z book, I’m working on the quote book, I’m exploring my own spirituality, I’m 30 something thousand into my free rice project, I’ve started the process of trying to figure out what it is that I’m holding in so I can let it go, I’m in the middle of my NaBloPoMo, I’m working on a love letter in nothing but song lyrics, I’m working on my 101 beautiful/meaningful photos project, I’m reading and watching Fox News and other news sources in order to be more up to date on the things going on in the world around me, I’m working on the state quarter collection, I’m trying to cut down the sodas, I’m starting research on my diet and exercise plan I want to create, I’m drinking my Ultra Glycemx each day, I’m blogging about each task, I’m working on learning 20 new recipes, I’ve visited Lori in Austin, I’ve cooked Sunday dinner twice, given blood once, restarted project 365, completed 5 of 12 of the Learning to Love you More projects, started a scrapbook for my 101, bought myself a new “party” dress with shoes and accessories and purse, am expanding my musical scope and found a new band I like, had some no spend days, made my bed a few times, am writing a fanfic, have watched two movies in the theater, taken a self portrait and am reading two non fiction books.

And that is from all my lists.  So looking back, yeah, I guess I’ve accomplished something.  It makes me feel a little bit better.

Ok- back to your regularly scheduled blog surfing now!

Have a great day!

Progress is a Fabulous Thing!

Posted in 101,NaBlPoMO,Things Completed by Donna on January 1, 2009
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So I’ve completed some things on all the lists at the top and I’m excited to post about it.

So here we go:

on the 109 in 2009, I made a writing schedule and a list of 25 things about me that I love

on the 101 in 1001 I’ve completed #51 A new favorite food which is Hummus, and #87 which is the 25 things about me.

on the “other” to do list #74-make a list of 25 things about the hubby that I love and share it with him.  So Yeah, Progress is a wonderful fabulous thing.

Is It Really 2009?

Posted in 101,Ankle,Holidays,List,NaBlPoMO by Donna on January 1, 2009
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I guess so.  Wow, it’s another new year already.

And I’ve got big plans!  I’m on the blogroll for NaBloPoMo for this month.  I’m gonna try it again and see if I can post each day.  I’ve got the list for the 109 in 2009 up too and I’m going to start working on that.  Of course a lot of those on the list are parts of my 101 lists but you know, that’s okay.  I’m knocking out 3 things at once and that’s good.

This hard cast comes off tomorrow.  And in case you haven’t seen it, let me just share it with you for a minute.The castDid you think I was kidding when I called it Post it Yellow?? LOL  It’s been on my nerves for the past week, I think I’m just anxious to have it off.  And tomorrow is THE DAY!  Yep, that’s right and I can’t wait.  In less than 24 hours, I should will be in a walking cast.  Finally the ability to walk, go up stairs, play Guitar Hero and cook will be in my hands again!  Ohhh and work, let’s not forget work.  I’ve been off for almost a month now and it’s driving me batty to be in this house, this apartment 75% of the time.

Not to mention, I realllyyyyyyy want to shave my left leg.  Girls there is nothing worse in this world than needing to shave your leg and not being able to because of a cast.  YIKES!

But here we are.  In a New Year.  And I’ve got some things to accomplish.  Do you want to see all three of my fabulous lists??  Check up at the top.  I’m ambitious I know.  I’m just eager not only to figure out what this life is supposed to be about but explore things about me that I haven’t been able to.

Rach said when she turned 33 she thought it was going to be a great year.  Well I think I’m going to say the same thing.  33 is going to be a fabulous year!!!!  And the 14 days leading up to it too!!!  LOL

What about you?

#59 is Now completed

Posted in 101,Things Completed by Donna on December 31, 2008
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Thanks to Mama ( my MIL) I have a new digital camera and printer station.  It was an early birthday present.  And in my favorite color too!!! I’m excited because now I can finish all those photo projects I’ve got to do.  More later after the battery (which was included!!!) is charged.  Well and I have read the directions!  Woohooo!!!!

Thank you mama!!!!!100_3558100_3559

Dear Daddy,

Posted in 101,Daddy by Donna on December 27, 2008
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I’ve been putting this off for a while now. You know I put it on my list of things to do that I wanted to write you this letter. I thought about putting it in a bottle and setting it out to sea. You know, kill two birds with one stone. But each time, I’ve decided against it. I thought about writing it and then taking with me when I got your stone mounted and then burning it and putting the ashes across your small plot between the girls. I’ve thought of a ton of ways to send this. But I know no matter what, no matter how I do this, you are going to see it. Maybe this will help someone who I am thinking of be able to sit down and write her father a much needed letter and get some things off her chest. Goodness knows we can both benefit from getting somethings off our chests.

I miss you. I’m sure that you know that. I’m sure you can see from where you are that I have missed you every day for the last almost 6 years now. Remember all those opinions you always gave so freely that I didn’t always listen to? They would have come in handy. But I hope you are proud. I hope I’ve at least turned out a little bit better than you hoped. I hope you know that the time you were sick and my being there to help take care of you that I don’t regret it. I certainly wish things could have been different. But you know, Robert Dale and I had the conversation that knowing what I know would I really consider going back and changing things. The answer is the same as it was the night of your viewing.

No I wouldn’t. It all would have lead to the same ending, your passing, but just in a different way. I know it was your time. I know you accomplished all you had meant to do. It still doesn’t help.

I know you wanted Kenny and Larry and I to be closer but it wasn’t possible. I don’t think they cared enough and after having my issues with it, I’m almost at ok with it. I regret that they can’t see me know, they can’t know their baby sister because of their own issues. Well, you know Larry passed. So it’s just me and Kenny now. I haven’t heard from him since we wrote me that letter trying to get the guitar. His loss.

It’s certainly different now. I did get to move to Shreveport. Something you had always wanted to do. 5 really awesome years. Mavis and Pappy adopted me and they’re wonderful, but I think you knew that. I got married, well you know that. We have our ups and downs but we’re making it right now. We moved to California and it’s been an adventure for the most part. I think we’re going to be fine once we get through some issues. But we’re working on that.

I’ve decided to start working on my writing. Not sure where it’s going to go. But I’ve also discovered a creative side that I didn’t know existed. I’ve been having fun with that. I even managed to make you a scrapbook. Now did you think I’d ever be that creative??? Not I.

Everyone is doing good for the most part. Lori has a baby now and Daniel has one on the way. Maybe once I lose some of this weight, things will work out for us and we’ll end up having one. Life goes on right?

It doesn’t diminish the fact that I miss you and love you. I always wonder if you are proud of the woman I’ve become. I struggled for the longest time with a huge hole trying to figure out if I told you I loved you that last night. I was so proud of the fact that you were on the couch and not in that bed that I couldn’t remember. Thanks for letting me know. You have no idea how much that meant to me that you could let me know that I did tell you I love you.

I’m droning on I know. I can’t help it. I could go for ages and ages on stuff after all it’s been 6 years. But I’m not going to. I just wanted you to know a few things and get a few things off my chest.

I know we didn’t have the greatest relationship, but at least we loved each other and we knew that. I couldn’t help feeling good when you told everyone that I was the child that helped take care of you. I was proud that you were proud. Maybe that’s your legacy. I know in some little way that I did make you proud. Granted we all have our share of mistakes but that’s just another chance to learn it and do it right huh?!

Ok, I’m signing off. My broken ankle is swollen and pushing on this post it yellow cast. (you like the color huh??) You’re stubborn and pigheaded child is giving them hell for this broken ankle. But you wouldn’t expect anything less would you? I mean I did get the stubborn and pigheadedness from you. Well you and mamaw. Guess it just runs on that side right?

Oh well, I love and miss you (I can’t say that enough) and know that we’ll talk again. I’m sure I’ll end up writing another letter before it’s over with.

Until then,

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